Adjusting Your Thinking

I have been morbidly obese for so many years...almost 1/3 of my life...that it is difficult for me to begin thinking as someone who is merely overweight. When I look in the mirror I expect to see a morbidly obese person staring back at me. When I look at photos of myself I expect to see an extremely fat person smiling out from the photograph. I don't recognize myself anymore.

I no longer have to worry about wearing out the crotches in my pants before the pants themselves wear out. That's something a lot of obese people deal with...the crotches and inner thighs of our pants wear out quickly because of the constant friction from our thighs rubbing together when we walk. My thighs no longer rub together when I walk.

I haven't had a "non-obese summer" in a long time, but summer in the South can be very unpleasant when you endure it wearing long sleeves and long pants the whole time. Plus, you have to dust powder on your body to keep from chafing...anywhere where you rub together (thighs, upper arms, fat rolls around the middle, etc.) you have to powder yourself or you'll pay for it later. I remember taking a vacation to a warm destination several years ago and after 2 days there I was laying on the bed in my underwear with my inner thighs rubbed raw from friction and chafing from simply WALKING and SWEATING with my thunder thighs rubbing together.

I had to plan my life, my wardrobe, everything around these problems. Chafing. Occasional incontinence. (Yes, I said incontinence.) Bringing little containers of powder with me so I could re-powder at work in the middle of the day. It's just unbelievable.